People often ask me “what’s your secret to success”? I get asked frequently about the ONE THING I did or the ONE THING I changed that made me successful. Well, without defining the meaning of success (because who needs clarity) or type of success I’m referring to, I will reveal to you with zero confidence (with loads of alternative facts) the secret to success.
There are actually 3 books that will change your life – or the life of whomever you gift them to – forever.
But first, you have to have it in you. You have to really want to know:
Are you ready to learn the secret to success?
Is There a Doctor in the House?
Say you’re at a party. You’ve had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you’re introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you’d like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven’t had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You’re filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you’ve ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .
•How do people in wheelchairs have sex?
•Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?
•Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?
•Why does asparagus make my pee smell?
•Why do old people grow hair on their ears?
•Is the old adage “beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . .” really true?
. . . then Why Do Men Have Nipples? is the book for you.
Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, Why Do Men Have Nipples? offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.
Are you punctual, productive, and conscientious? Now there’s help. Because work expands to fit the time available, it’s never been easier to do the minimum amount of work in the maximum amount of time. Whether you’re naturally organized, cursed with achievement, or simply obsessive-compulsive, we’ll show you how to stop performing and start procrastinating today. Or tomorrow.
Learn how to:
* Shirk responsibility and put off personal goals
* Make your home and office space more conducive to procrastination
* Ignore piles of paper, angry phone calls, and urgent emails
* Remove anxiety, fearfulness, and stress
* Watch more television
Parents of the world rejoice! Knock Knock’s bestselling How to Traumatize Your Children has been revamped with all-new totally dysfunctional illustrations. This groundbreaking instructional volume teaches you how to give your children the lifelong gifts of mental and emotional damage. Whether you employ the same ruinous techniques your parents used or try out an entirely new approach, you are bound to succeed!
Learn the latest buzzwords and trends in traumatic parenting!
Choose a personal trauma style controlling, indulgent, and more!
Paperback; 4.5 x 6.5 inches; 144 pages; written by Knock Knock
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